- as outlined below, watch cnn ever again, due to their reporting on the coming armageddon as if it were news. good job, guys. as a news source, you’ve achieved the level of trust and journalistic acumen that i usually expect from x-men comics and those larouche pamphlets that the straight-edge kids hand out in harvard square.
- you may have heard of this guy mel gibson. way back when, he filled out a pair of tights real nicely and once he even went against his mercenary ways and helped a band of post-apocalyptic survivors fend off roving marauders. those were the days. now he denies the holocaust and blames the jews for making him drink and drive. and for starting all those wars. that were actually started by evangelical christians. just like mel (catholic, whatever). anyway, i’m done with this clown—no more mel gibson movies. in fact, the first thing i’m doing when i get back to boston is microwaving my road warrior dvd! now, that’s consumer retribution!
- drink miller high life. also explained below, this piss was vile even back when it was all i could afford. now, i may be broker than ever, but my standards continue to rise (like inflation!) and at the ripe old age of 25, i can confidently proclaim that i will never force this swill down my craw again! bring on the miller lite!
that’s it. everything else is fair game.
1 comment:
I'm with you on the last two, but can't give up on Anderson Cooper just yet.
Post a Comment