do you have it? is it catching?

it's world cup fever (also known as soccerhea, the futbolic plague, and antibrazilitis). cases have been reported worldwide in only the past week. medical experts are at a loss as to the methodolgy of this new pathogen, but leading theories suggest it may be passed on by chanting, singing, dancing, and flag-waving in large groups. dr. gupta has been studying the effects of soccerhea since the first cases were reported in the united states in 1991, after the women's national team won their first world cup.

"we are heartened to see that even as the number of cases has increased in recent months," he told us here at the bean, "the number of fatalities has dropped to almost zero. with continued hard work, and a little luck, we can turn soccerhea from a deadly scourge to a mild, but permanent, annoyance. like herpes."

symptoms include (but are not limited to):
face-painting
sweaty palms
jersey buying
score checking
nausea (before games, during tied matches)
play-by-play addiction
hoarse voice
registering with recreational soccer team

web sites with more info:
stage 2 chart
who should i cheer for?
new york times world cup blog